Happy Birthday to my sweetheart!

This week was one to celebrate, as my sweetheart turned 40!  I am a bit jealous of his good genes (because he looks 10 years younger), but am thankful that he will always be older than me:) Ha!  

I contemplated throwing him a big surprise party but if you know Cullen, then you know he is not the type to enjoy a lot of "hoopla". Cullen is one that refers to birthdays as "just another day that ends in y".  His simple approach to life is one of the things I love most about him.  He has such a gracious heart and such a humble spirit...and is so very sentimental (a quality that I cherish in him). As I thought about his birthday, I wanted to do something special, but something that HE would appreciate.  I remembered seeing something on Pinterest and decided to expand on that idea and I am so proud of how it turned out!  In honor of his 40th birthday, I decided to create a book of letters for him...from those who know and love him.  I began this idea back in April with a letter to his family, friends and even some of his coworkers...asking for their help in my endeavor:)  The letter:

Hello everyone!

If you're receiving this letter it is because you are someone that has impacted Cullen’s life and likewise someone who has been impacted by Cullen. As you know, Cullen will be turning 40 in December.  To celebrate his birthday, I would like to put together a little surprise to let him know that there are many who are celebrating his 40 years of life. I am going to try and create "40 Years of Memories" by filling 40 envelopes with a memory his friends and family have of him.  Cullen is very sentimental and I thought this would be an incredible keepsake for him and one that can be passed down to Will…and any kids to come.  The letters/memories will come from family members, friends, coworkers and church friends so that it will truly encompass all of you who are important to Cullen. 

I need your help in creating this surprise for Cullen.  If you have a spare moment in the next few weeks, I would be so grateful if you would jot down a few words about how Cullen has impacted your life, or simply a favorite memory of him.  Please do whatever is easiest for you as far as handwritten or typed.  It can also be as long, or as short, as you want…there are no rules or formats, just something that will be meaningful for Cullen to keep.

Thank you so very much for helping me with this! I know how busy everyone is, so I truly appreciate you taking the time to do this for me…and ultimately for Cullen.  Your time and efforts will be well worth it when he reads what each of you wrote. (Please don't forget to keep it a surprise until then though!) 

My sincerest thanks,

Bethany Smith

P.S. I am enclosing an envelope that is addressed to my parents’ house-so that Cullen will not see themJ.   

I got a handful of letters immediately and more over the summer. I decided to send out a reminder email around October to remind everyone to please send them as soon as they could because I had decided to make the letters into a scrapbook. I am so thankful to Cullen's friends and family for helping me with this because the end result was incredible!  I was so impressed with the time that so many put into them...and how genuinely heartfelt so many were.  I loved reading the stories people shared and it was so special to read about how much Cullen means to his friends and family.  I did not need these letters to tell me what a remarkable husband I have...but I am grateful that he has this book as a keepsake, and something he can pass down to Will and baby #2.  I am sharing this on my blog for others out there who may need an idea for a birthday or anniversary...for that sentimental loved one in your life:)  

Happy Birthday Cullen!

We celebrated over dinner...and his favorite dessert, banana pudding!  Will helped his daddy blow out his candle with his spatula...aka, his sword:)  

The spirit of Christmas...

Do you ever just have one of those days, where everything goes right and you end the day feeling so warm and cozy inside?!  Well, I do...and today was sure one of them.  It has been a long week at our house...a week with a sick little one.  It started last Saturday with pink eye in both eyes, then fever, and then a diagnosis of pneumonia.  I will have to say though, that our little guy has been a trooper!  I am so thankful that we got started on antibiotics early and even more thankful at how quickly Will started acting like himself again:)  

Last night, my sweet husband told me he wanted me to take a day to go shop, or do whatever...just a day to have some "me time".  I think he could sense that I was running fever...cabin fever that is.  I am so grateful to be married to such a thoughtful man, who can read me like a book. I really hit the jackpot when the Lord brought Cullen into my life!  

So today began with a non-fat white chocolate mocha(the "nonfat" thing just makes me feel better-they're still full of calories!) and then I was off to shop until I had gotten my fill of the Christmas hustle and bustle!  I went to TJ Max-it was heaven!  I think I went down every aisle...just enjoying not having to worry that Will was going to lose it before I could get out of the store:)  I then went to the mall...and this is where the warm and cozy feeling I mentioned earlier comes into play.  I sat in the food court eating my Auntie Anne's pretzel (yes, I cannot go to the mall without getting one) and began my favorite hobby of all...people watching!  While I will confess, people watching does not always bring about warm and cozy feelings...sometimes it leads me to believe that our society is dying a slow, painful death; but today was different.  There was truly a spirit of Christmas and you could just feel it by watching the shoppers.  I saw elderly couples, and young couples alike, holding hands.  I saw grandparents shopping with their grandchildren, wearing smiles that told the world how proud they were of those little ones.  I saw generations of families shopping together...and having fun doing so!  I saw moms and dads loving on their babies and children.  This "spirit" was not isolated to the food court, but to everyone I passed in the mall. It was one of those days that when I smiled at people, they smiled back.  I got in my car after shopping 11 days before Christmas, and was surprised at how wonderfully pleasant my shopping experience was:)  I think I forgot how contagious the Christmas spirit really is...and I am ending this day wishing the "spirit of Christmas" stayed with us year round.  Let us all enjoy this most wonderful time of the year!  Merry Christmas!!!:)

Comfortable joy...

Dear Little One, 

You are 21 weeks old today, growing in my belly...the app on my phone tells me you are the size of a banana:)  This may sound crazy to you when you read this, but it is just now really sinking in that we are pregnant again.  With your older brother, everything felt a bit different...and up until this point, I worried that the differences in my responses were wrong, but I am here to tell you that they are not.  Will's arrival not only brought excitement, but a level of anxiety that I did not even know was present.  I can remember thinking about how his arrival was going to change our worlds...and our lifestyle.  I felt I had to be "prepared" as much as possible on the forefront because deep down I felt a bit ill-prepared on the inside.  I had never been a mother before and had nothing to base it on.  What if I was horrible at it?  What if I didn't know what to do?  How will I handle working and being a mommy?  If I stay home will I like it?  How will I continue to be an attentive wife with a little one that needs me all the time?  How will I still find time for friends and family? How should I decorate the nursery?  How will I give a bath to something so small?  Will I ever have me time again?  These were the things that consumed a lot of my thoughts when I found out I was pregnant with your brother...these thoughts along with sheer excitement that we were going to be a family!  I have realized that since finding out about you, I have been pretty at ease and sometimes forget that I am pregnant-that is until I see myself in the mirror and wish we had less lighting and wish we had "skinny mirrors" like they do at the fair.  I have not been near as wrapped up in thinking about this pregnancy or the details I considered while pregnant with your brother.  For a little while I felt guilty about this and kept asking myself, am I not as excited?  What's the deal?  It then hit me...I am every bit as excited; probably a bit more. Not only do we get to anticipate another baby, but I also get to anticipate seeing Will as a big brother...the greatest gift we can give him next to his salvation in Christ!  The difference is not my level of excitement, but rather the way I am handling that excitement.  With Will, everything was new...every pregnancy symptom, every thought, every worry, every anticipation, etc.  With you, I am already a mommy and I don't have to worry about the petty things I did with Will.  I don't have to doubt myself or consume my thoughts with the "what ifs".  What I am experiencing is comfortable joy!  There is such a comfort in knowing that I don't have to worry about things with you, because I have seen the way the Lord provided me with all the skills I needed to be a mom, when I needed them.  He saw me through those dark times when I felt inadequate.  He gave me peace when I didn't know how to keep Will from crying.  He gave me strength when Will was sick and I was running on fumes. He gave me patience when Will wouldn't sleep through the night until  he was almost a year old.  He gave me a new perspective when I realized my house would never be truly clean again. He gave me support through friends, family and new mommy friends when I needed them most.  He has provided beyond what I could have asked for, and so there is an incredible feeling of comfort in knowing this now.  I already love you beyond comprehension and the one thing I do dwell on, is seeing you and holding you for the first time!  My heart was forever changed when I saw your brother for the first time, and we are blessed beyond words that we get to experience that feeling again with you!  We are not finding out what we are having (your sweet daddy wanted it to be a surprise) so your nursery will be white and yellow...hope you like it:)  I cannot pray for you by name yet, but that doesn't mean I am not praying my heart out for you!  That is one thing that has been true of both pregnancies...my gratitude to God for blessing us, and trusting us, with the gift of children. You are one lucky little one, because you have an outstanding daddy who is so loving!  There will not be a day in your life when you don't hear the words, "I love you" from both your mommy and your daddy. We are not perfect parents, as there is no such thing, but I pray you will always give us grace in our parenting.  I pray that you will never know a day that you don't feel the love of your parents...and the love of Christ.  I cannot to wait to meet you little one!!!  

Thank you for letting me share my heart with you today...I hope that one day it will mean something to you to know how much we loved you before you were even born!  

Love, Mommy

Send a card at Christmas...

Christmas is my favorite time of year and it is no secret to those who know me that it makes me giddy and borderline obnoxious!  I love everything about Christmas...the lights, the trees, the songs, baking, wrapping presents, giving presents, receiving presents, the movies, hot apple cider, gingerbread cookies, cinnamon candles, the Salvation Army bell, cold weather, receiving Christmas cards, sending Christmas cards and most of all...I love celebrating the birth of my Savior!  I know, I am "that" person at Christmas...I really should have my own Hallmark movie!  

As much as I adore all things Christmas and how joyful this time of year makes me, I have been rather convicted the last few days about those out there that may be dreading Christmas this year.  It may be their first Christmas without their mom, or dad...or even their child.  It may be that they fear this will be their loved one's last Christmas.  It may be their inability to enjoy Christmas to its fullest because they are battling cancer, or watching a loved one go through treatment.  It may be that they have lost their job and cannot afford to give their family what they believe to be a "proper" Christmas.  It may be a family that is struggling to get pregnant and seeing all of the Christmas cards with babies and children brings them down.  There are so many people hurting and I tend to forget that when I get caught up in my own Christmas wonderland.  I have felt very convicted to remember all of those in my life that may be dealing with some very difficult emotions this Christmas and to reach out to those people that I love.  I am creating a bit of a challenge for myself to send a card to these people...but not a Christmas card.  A card of thoughtfulness, of encouragement...and of compassion for whatever it is they may be going through. A card that lets them know that they are not forgotten and that someone is praying for them.  I worked as a hospice social worker for 9 years and I saw firsthand how trying the Christmas season can be for those who are facing the death of a loved one, or for those who are grieving the loss of a loved one. I know how encouraged my patients' families were when they received a phone call, or a card, or a short visit from someone...and I am challenging myself to be that friend to those who may need it this year.  A card may sound small, but it carries big meaning to someone who may be hurting beyond what they can handle.  

Christmas has always meant so much to me, but this year I want to consider what it may be meaning for others.  While Christmas can spark a variety of emotions, one thing is certain about Christmas...it offers hope.  Jesus' birth is a precious day for believers because it celebrates the day of our Savior and what that means for us.  We have a God that loves us so much that He sent his ONLY son to become flesh so that He could bear our sins on a cross...so that those who come to know Him could have eternal life with Him.  We are loved beyond what we deserve and a God that loves us enough to do that, will be there with us through the worst of times.  I am so very thankful that love came down at Christmas...and that love is ours to give!  My conviction may not be a conviction of yours, but if it is...join me in sending a card at Christmas:)  

Will Bug!

Dear Will,

I am so sorry I have not written you since your first birthday.  My only excuse is that your little brother or sister has made Mommy extra nauseated and extra tired!  I am doing much better now, so it seemed like a perfect time to sit down and write you.  

Will, there are no words to describe just how much I love you!  I tell you all the time, "I love the stew out of you".  I am not even sure what Mommy's crazy expression means, but I do know that it is my attempt at telling you how incredibly happy you make me!  I am here to tell you that you just keep getting better too!  These last few weeks, you have grown before my eyes.  Not just in terms of getting taller and outgrowing half of the cute longalls I had bought you that you never got to wear...but you have grown emotionally and mentally too!  You have gotten so much more personality and you understand so much more than I even realized. 

You are still not talking a ton, but you understand just about everything that Mommy and Daddy say to you.  The words you say the most are:  Daddy, Mommy, "what's this?", Ga (Gus), Che (Cheney), jus (juice) and you love to tell me long stories that I cannot understand.  You are so cute when you tell a story because you use a lot of inflection when you talk, and even use your hands!-I can't imagine who you get that from!:)  You LOVE bath time and could live outside, you love it so much.  You are a high-energy little boy and won't sit still long enough to realize how fun cartoons are!  Your favorite foods are CHEESE, mangos, scrambled eggs, blueberries, Nilla Wafers, goldfish, Ritz crackers, homemade pasta Depalmas, black olives and pickles.  You literally ate an entire jar of Claussen pickles in a day and a half!!!  

You started walking around 14 and a half months and once you started, you never looked back.  You can crawl up the stairs in no time and you've gotten very good at coming down them too.  Your favorite books to read at bedtime are "tractors" and "I love you through and through".  You still love to be rocked before you go to sleep...and I sing a medley of "Jesus Loves Me", "Hush Little Baby", "You are My Sunshine" and "Victory in Jesus".  Victory in Jesus may seem random, but growing up Southern Baptist it is one song that I know every word and every stanza to...so you'll probably grow up knowing that one:)  

You adore your Daddy and nothing gets you more excited than seeing him come home!  Before it started getting dark outside so early, we would wait in the front yard for Daddy to pull  up and you knew the minute you saw his truck at the end of the street that he was coming and you would start giggling and grinning from ear to ear.  I know that after being at work all day that nothing brings more joy to Daddy's heart than to see you light up at the sight of him!  

We have lots of play dates with your friends William Remmert and Caroline Brignac and little William answers the question, "who's your buddy" with the answer "Will".  It is so precious to me to see two little boys become buddies at such a young age, and my prayer for you is that you will always maintain good guy friends.  Guy friends that will have shared values and guy friends that will encourage your walk with Jesus.  Your daddy is so very blessed to have so many outstanding guy friends, so that will forever be my prayer for you too-that and that you marry a good girl that mommy loves:) Ha!

Just this past week, you have started playing Wheel of Fortune at night while you eat your dinner.  It is hilarious!  The show comes on and when a new puzzle pops up, you yell out, "ga la ma ma daadaama!"-or some other crazy phrase, and then you clap like you think you got it right!  It is truly hysterical!  You have also started taking Mommy and Daddy's keys and you take them to all the doors in the house trying to lock them and unlock them:)  You are so observant of all that we do...and I am starting to notice that all the more!  

Will, I am so excited that you are going to be a big brother and that God is going to give you the gift of a sibling relationship.  I am already so proud of the influence you will have in your little brother or sister's life, and it is going to be so fun watching you emerge into this role.  I love you Will bug and cannot thank you enough for the joy you bring to my heart!  Please know that whether Mommy writes to you every week, or every 6 months, that it does not change the overwhelming amount of love I have for you!  

Love you to pieces!!!

Love, Mommy

Oh yea...I have a blog!:)

Oh my...I have not blogged in ages!  I am here to tell you that it is so hard for me to remember to write...and so I applaud all of those out there that are far more self-disciplined than I am!  So much has happened since my last post...on June 4th (just a mere 5 months ago!)  Our little Will turned one in May and we celebrated his birthday in June with an elephant themed party.  It was wonderful to have so many of our friends and family come to celebrate with us!  Will's party is proof that it's not necessary to "break the bank" on a birthday party that they won't remember anyways!  

Cutest and yummiest cake ever!  

Will is always a big hit with his cousins!

Will did not love the cake, but he was such a precious boy all day!  

Around mid-July our little guy started walking...and once he started, he has not stopped!  He is so adorable walking around like Charlie Chaplin:)  

For Father's Day, my friend Laura and I got Will and Ashley together to make surprises for their dads:)  I saw this idea on Pinterest, and just like everything else that I "pin", it looked so easy...it was however NOT.  This little idea became a huge act of love as we chased our little ones around, poured sweat as we hauled rocking chairs up and down the Riverwalk looking for decent lighting, and as we got sympathetic stares from all of the walkers and joggers. The end result however, was a precious frame of pictures spelling D-A-D that now hangs in our living room:) 

In August, Cullen and I found out that we are expecting baby Smith #2!  The baby is due on April 21st and we have decided not to find out the gender with this one, since it will likely be our last one.  I will admit that at first I was opposed to this idea (it was Cullen's idea) but the more time that has gone by, the more excited I have become.  I keep picturing that day in my head...planned c-section and getting to watch Cullen's reaction as they pull he/she out!  I am even more excited when I think about him getting to go to the waiting area and announce it to our family and friends...such a fun and old-fashioned way of doing it.  The "planner" in me is going crazy because I can't have everything ready...but I have to remind myself, the baby won't care:)  

That is my summary of events...just hitting the highlights because I know I am leaving out all kinds of fun things!  



  

One pin at a time...

Alright everyone, I have made a "buku" of Pinterest recipes and I am going to review them for y'all so that y'all don't have to waste your time on the crappy ones.  I know, I know...I am so awesome:)  LOL. 

Okay, first pin to review is the pound cake I made today (and last night...read on).  

Here is the link to the recipe: http://www.plainchicken.com/2011/10/lemon-pound-cake.html

It is flat out delicious!  And soooo easy!  I made it last night while having my one-year old under my feet and forgot to add the sugar:( I was so disappointed when I put a very bland piece of warm pound cake in my mouth!  So, I would HIGHLY recommend not leaving out the sugar! Ha!  I remade it this morning and oh my gosh, my taste buds are hooked! I did not use lemon zest and they were still just fine:)  Don't you think pound cake is named so appropriately...since it is sure to pack on the pounds! 

The second pin to review are some ahhh-mazing chocolate chip cookies.  These are on the same blog so I figured we would just cover this blogger's awesomeness all at the same time!  

http://www.plainchicken.com/2010/03/bisquick-chocolate-chip-cookies.html

These are pretty much just your good old-fashioned chocolate chip cookies.  They are yummy!  I would not cook them as long as it says if you like them super soft-almost doughy:)  

The third is a buttermilk-blueberry coffee cake.  What's not to like about this?!  http://www.alexandracooks.com/2011/06/29/buttermilk-blueberry-breakfast-cake/

I have made this twice and very yummy!  Use fresh blueberries if you can!  Be careful not to overcook as it will dry out and not near as yummy!

The fourth is not a fancy meal at all...so if you are one of those who only eats gourmet yuppy food, then ignore this one:)  It's a pepperoni pizza bake/casserole and it's very good!  My little one-year old LOVES it!  I have made this 3 times and have used sausage once and ground beef twice-I think I preferred the ground beef style, but both are good.  I am just someone who needs sausage in small doses.  I use more cheese than what it calls for-as I always do!  I also added some parmesan cheese with garlic in it for a little more flavor (Publix sells some of this and it's so delicious!)  Get the BIG jar of Ragu...you will need all of it.  Also-cover every inch of the top with pepperonis...it just makes it all the more yummy!  It makes enough to serve one and freeze one...my kind of meal!  http://www.recipelion.com/Casserole-Recipes/Mamas-Pizza-Casserole

The next pin to review is a Buffalo Chicken Pasta bake.  I will be honest, on the surface this sounds delicious, right?  It's not all that great however:(  I think I am so used to the Buffalo Chicken Dip that is sooo meaty and yummy that this was a bit of a letdown.  There is far too much pasta and not enough yummy stuff.  It needs more chicken and less pasta, of course at that point you might as well make the dip and feast on it as a meal.  So I was not "wowed" by this one-hence the half full Pyrex in our fridge right now.  

http://lentzedlife.wordpress.com/2013/02/10/freezer-for-matt-buffalo-chicken-pasta-bake/

These are simply my opinions and you may love it!:)

The next pin is a cheesy baked chicken that is very good!!!  

http://jamiecooksitup.net/2011/10/crispy-cheddar-chicken/

It is very filling, so when it calls for just 4 chicken breasts, you could definitely feed 6-8 because it is rich and filling.  We had ours with rice and green beans and it was a perfect meal.  

This next one is on my board "yummy stuff" but I think I need to create a new board called "very yummy stuff" for this one!  

http://www.gastrecipes.com/2012/11/cinnamon-french-toast-bake.html

It is so yummy and so easy! I made it the night before and popped it in the oven the next morning and it was WONDERFUL!  I actually want to go make it now!:)

This is truly the BEST recipe I have found on Pinterest:

http://www.mommyskitchen.net/2008/08/no-peek-beef-tips.html

My husband rarely raves about a meal and this one got the question, "can we have this again next week?"  My husband and I play a game at dinner called "put it on the rotation or not?"  I let him tell me what he liked and didn't like about our dinner and then we decide if it will ever grace our kitchen again:)  I enjoy it as no wife wants to make something that their husband ultimately hates.  If he would rather have a sackful from Krystal's then we know it needs to go in the discard recipe pile!  This recipe is seriously the easiest, most delicious recipe ever!  The beef tips turn out sooo tender and the gravy is great for rice or mashed potatoes-I always do rice.  But remember "NO PEEKING!"

Next up-oven tacos.  Not all that impressed.  Let's just say this did not make the "put it on the rotation" list!  They were just mediocre and truly if I want tacos, I like just good ol' homemade tacos-the old  school way!

http://mommyimhungry.blogspot.com/2012/11/oven-tacos.html

You like soup???  This potato recipe is yummy!  I will probably make it again when it is not 100 degrees outside...but will leave out the celery (at my husband's request!)  

http://healthycookingrecipes101.com/cheesy-potato-soup/

Another great meal is this roast:

http://bergecentral.blogspot.com/2011/01/mississippi-roast.html

It too makes a delicious gravy that is perfect for homemade mashed potatoes!  My husband gave this one 2 thumbs up too!

I will end on another favorite at our house:  melt in your mouth chicken!  It is named very appropriately and will never let you down!  It is great for when you're having company!  You can "prepare" it ahead of time so all you have to do is throw it in the oven!  It truly has the best flavor!  NOTE:  DO NOT USE LIGHT OR FAT-FREE MAYO!  It is best with Duke's REAL mayo!  

http://www.food.com/recipe/melt-in-your-mouth-chicken-breasts-37336

Well, I am off to go walk with my little guy!  I hope this helps some of you who are debating on which pins to cook:)  Happy cooking!  

Happy Birthday Will!

Dear Will,

I am not sure how this has happened, but today is your first birthday!  Where did the time go?!  It truly seems like just yesterday that we were at the hospital waiting on you to get here so we could love all over  you...and now here you are a ONE year old!  I am not going to tell you that I am sad that you're bigger...because I am not.  I am sad that time seems to move so fast because I don't feel that I get to enjoy each stage with you as long as I would like.  I love the stage you are in now...and I think that every time I sit down to write to you.  You truly get more and more fun each and every day...and at this stage you are sweeter than you've ever been.  You have learned how to give the best kisses!  You open your mouth very wide and come in and wrap it around mommy and daddy's mouths.  After you give a kiss, you smile really big because you know you did something sweet!  I think that is my favorite part...seeing how happy you get knowing you made us happy:)  It is these moments that I get a glimpse into your precious little mind and heart and I am so proud of the little boy you already are!  You are not walking yet, but you could if you wanted to.  You hold onto everything and walk around using anything you can find (including the bar stools that you push around).  You have learned how to get off the couch by diving  head first into the floor.  Mommy used to try and catch you and ease you down until I realized that you seem to enjoy the rougher route!  You have 6 teeth now...4 on top and 2 on bottom.  You will eat pretty much anything, but you hate sweets.  In the past week you have spit out a homemade chocolate chip cookie piece, as well as a Krispy Kreme doughnut!  One day you will probably think that was pretty stupid to spit out such yumminess! (Yes-that is a made up Mommy word!)  I think your favorite foods are blueberries and grilled cheese sandwiches.  You can eat an entire grilled cheese and still have room for goldfish and fruit!  You are still attached to your lovey that we call "puppy".  You go to sleep with puppy and wake up with him in your hand.  I bought a backup puppy a couple of weeks ago just in case your puppy goes missing...which we will hope doesn't happen!  You still love the outdoors and we still meet Mrs. Laura and Ashley at the Riverwalk a lot which you always enjoy.  We got you a baby pool that you love to splash in.  You love to throw your toys out and then try to reach them.  I always get nervous that you're going to tip out and knock your head open on the concrete, but you always seem to keep your balance.  We went to the zoo this past week with Lindsay, Maggie and Blaine and you were a little angel.  You did not cry one time-although you almost did on the choo-choo train.  Daddy still calls you "squatch" and Mommy still calls you "angel pie" and "budders" the most.  We both call you "Will bug" and this seems to be the name that will stick! I am so sorry that your parents picked such crazy nicknames for you, but one thing is for sure, we love the stew out of you!  I really cannot thank you enough for the joy that you have brought into our lives.  There is no way to thank God enough for giving you to us, and we cherish every moment with you.  I love you Will bug...and so does Daddy:)  Happy First Birthday!  Your birth day is truly a time of celebration for us!!!  

Not so picture perfect:)

Okay, so this past Saturday we went to take pictures for Will's one year photos...and also to get a couple of pictures of us with Will-ones that are not being taken by my extra long arm.  We met the photographer at Tannehill State Park.  Let me first begin by saying, I am guilty of looking on Pinterest and Facebook and seeing these picture perfect moments of little ones and thinking, "oh I want to get a shot like that!"  We got to Tannehill and I was already feeling a little anxious because Will had been crying for about 10 minutes.  The pictures were scheduled for 5:30 because lighting is good...but this is Will's worst time of day, so I thought it should be pretty interesting.  We started off with some of him and Cullen and I were able to make him smile with our usual goofy antics...pretending a phone call is for him and saying his name in silly ways.  Once Will was done with our usual stunts, he didn't want to smile anymore.  His face got very serious and at times it even looked miserably unhappy.  I have to give props to our photographer for being so sweet and patient and just going with the flow.  The last pics we had done by a professional were newborn pictures.  I now know why the majority of pictures that get featured are newborn pics...when your baby doesn't care if it is dressed up like a turtle, or put in a bucket, or laid naked on the floor...they just want to sleep.  At 12 months, things played out a little differently...I think it was payback for putting him in a wheelbarrow when he was a newborn:)  Cullen and I jumped around, we made noises, we sang "old McDonald"-very off key I might add, we tried tickling, we tried it all...and nothing.  In addition to the lack of smiles we were getting from Will, we were being full blown attacked by gnats.  I felt like a rotting piece of carcass the way they were swarming me...and not just me, but our photographer and poor Will.  If his pics end up looking like he has black freckles, everyone will now know why:)  I got so tickled when we were done because what "picture day" looked like in my head versus how it played out were so different.

Later that night as I rocked little Will to sleep and he looked up at me and smiled, I realized that pictures are just pictures.  While I will cherish photographs, the moments that can only be captured in my mind and kept in my heart are the ones I will covet the most.  So if there's any advice I can give for the unknowing Mom like myself, just "roll with it".  Kids will be kids, gnats will be gnats, but any picture of your little one will be priceless to you.  

Our "sneak peek".  Lindsey does such beautiful work!

My "mamma"...

My precious mamma:)

Tomorrow is Mother's Day and my first real Mother's Day-as I was 9 months pregnant this time last year!  While I am blown away by what it means to be a mother and the overwhelming joy and love that Will brings into my life every second of every day...that is not the focus of my mind this Mother's Day.  This Mother's Day, like every one in the past, I am focused on my mother...or as we say at the Powell house, "mamma".  While I have always celebrated my amazing mom on Mother's Day, it means more this year being a mom myself.  I am able to reflect more this year on all that my mom did for me, and for my brothers, growing up.  I have gained an even deeper understanding of the little things she did that made her the super mamma that she was...and is today!  From my earliest memory of my mom, I remember her love...and her affection.  I can remember holding hands and swinging our arms walking through the mall and there was nobody that I was more proud to be walking with.  I remember her making us hot chocolate at night and curling up in my bed to read "Arch books"-which were Bible stories set to rhyme...and they were so fun to read!  I will never forget the line from one of the books... "even though Jezebel was beautiful and rich, the Lord knew her heart was the heart of a witch". LOL!

I remember her waking us up by singing "you are my sunshine" and how happy I was to see her face standing in the doorway of my room.  I remember all the notes I got in my lunchbox telling me how happy I made her and how much she loved me.  I remember her checking me out of school on my birthday and taking me to Showbiz Pizza to make my day extra special.  I am sure you are not even allowed to be checked out for such now!  And most importantly I remember getting up with her at 5:30 a.m. to sit and have coffee while we had our "quiet times" with the Lord.  All these "little" things are memories I will cherish forever and it leaves me wondering what "little" things Will will cherish one day. (Writing Will will is very challenging!-I may should have thought about that when we were naming him!)  As I celebrate my Mamma this Mother's Day, I also celebrate the kind of mother I aspire and pray to be.  As a 34 year old woman, I am so thankful that I continue to build on these memories of my mom with memories that include Will...what a tremendous blessing from God!  I pray I never take my Mom for granted...or the privilege of being a mom myself.  Happy Mother's Day Mamma!  I am forever grateful for all the little ways you have always shown me the huge way in which you love me! :)  I love you!!!  

April 27th...

As April 27th approaches, marking 2 years since the tornado, I can't  stop thinking about the details of that day.  It is probably one of the most vivid days in my mind...even more than my own wedding day.  I remember walking outside that day and how thick the air the was...I have never felt anything like it, and hope I never do again.  I remember the angst that everyone was feeling as the weather blogs warned about how severe the storms may be.  I remember not being able to concentrate at work because I just wanted to be home.  My parents home had been damaged by the early morning storm, as well as the bridal shop where my wedding dress was being altered.  The early morning storm had hit so many familiar places in my hometown...and I remember thinking, "surely we won't have another tornado today"...stupid, stupid thought!  

I wrote something soon after the storm so that I would not forget what I felt at that time, and I feel it appropriate to include it today as we all prepare to remember April 27th, 2011.  

Sweet “Home” Alabama…Bethany Powell (soon to be Smith!)

April 27^th, 2011 is a day our state will never forget….a day of sadness and grief.  April 28^th however, marked a day of triumph as the city I live in rallied to survive the terrible loss it had endured. 

My fiancé and I decided to ride out the storm at my home in Northport, instead of his home in Glendale Gardens…little did we know that this one decision would provide so much protection.  We watched James Spann, as he warned those in Cullman of the deadly tornado going through their city.  I prayed silently asking for protection of these people.  It was shortly after this tornado devastated Cullman, that Pickens County was in the line of bad weather….and then Tuscaloosa.  I have lived in Alabama my entire life, so I have grown up on James Spann’s weather reports.  On April 27^th, there was something different in his voice…an urgency…a genuine fear. I watched in horror as a tornado ripped through the Tuscaloosa community.  It was almost too much to process, as I couldn’t believe it was happening right in front of me.  You couldn’t stop it, you could only watch and pray.  Even as I watched in disbelief, I hoped and prayed that it wasn’t as bad as it looked.  What I realize now is that “bad storm damage” was relative to what I had seen in the past.  I had never seen the damage I was about to be exposed to, therefore I had no reference point to prepare my eyes, mind and heart for what was to come. 

We drove to Glendale Gardens, a precious cul-de-sac in Tuscaloosa, full of historic homes and big trees.  As we pulled up, we saw emergency vehicles and could not get close to the street due to all of the down trees and power lines.  We parked and jumped out of the car, running to see his house and check on his dog…Gus.  Glendale Gardens was blocked, so we ran down the street of The Downs subdivision.  There were trees everywhere you looked.  The only smells were that of burning lines and natural gas.  The only sounds were those of sirens, alarms and people yelling names.  I wondered if they were yelling for people, pets, or help.  We crawled through rubble, trees, brush, glass to try and find a cut through to his home.  I watched my fiancé walk through someone’s home to get to their backyard.  I followed him.  I asked myself, where are the owners?  Why is it okay to be walking through someone’s else’s home?  We crawled over a fence and more downed trees until we were standing in the backyard of what used to be our home. 

My fiance’s home was destroyed in the tornado that destroyed everything in its path. His home was unrecognizable. It was a horrible sight and a feeling I will never forget.  The day before we had finished painting the inside of the house to prepare for our June wedding…the next day the house was gone.  We yelled for his dog, but there was no sound of barking. I felt broken as I feared what had happened to others, one street over, and miles away.  My heart sunk as I imagined the pain that others were feeling, that was far greater than ours.  I wept for others who had lost loved ones, their homes, their pets and their spirit.  I went home that night and cried to the Lord for healing. 

 The next day came.  The sun came up and we went to my fiance’s home to salvage anything that resembled items that were ours.  As we fumbled through the rubble, we looked up to find church members, friends, and complete strangers asking how they could be of help.  Everyone began going through the house trying to find items that would bring a sense of normalcy to our lives.  Strangers brought ice water, meals, snacks, hugs, words of encouragement and prayers to our street.  I received hugs from people I have never met…and may never encounter again.  The day went on.  Men arrived with chainsaws, and began working without asking.  A call came in later in the afternoon, from a woman in the area who had found Gus.  Very quickly I realized that we had not lost our home…we had only lost a house.  Our home is Tuscaloosa…a resilient community full of love.  The people of Tuscaloosa, and the entire state, have suffered a great loss…but they have also gained a sense of what we already had.  Tuscaloosa is a city of love, hope, charity and strength.  I am proud to call Alabama my home, and I am honored to live in Tuscaloosa.  

Before

After

Before

After

Notice how far the house moved from the chimney...

Incredible how the tornado literally picked the house up...

Before...

Pinterest Projects:)

Okay, so I am one of those who pins a gazillion things on Pinterest thinking, "I will try that".  Very little pins, besides recipes, ever make it off their board:)  These past two weeks, I am proud to say that I have tried and succeeded (shockingly) in doing more than cooking with my pins:)  

I was so lucky to find two awesome antique chairs on the Facebook site, "Tuscaloosa garage sale".  I got them both for $45 and they were in perfect condition structurally...they just needed some TLC in the paint and cushion department.  I wanted to try painting them and then applying an antique glaze...eeek!  I got them painted easy peazy (as my niece would say).  The challenging part was going to be applying the glaze, as I had never done this before.  I applied the glaze and it just looked dirty to me.  I applied more glaze and it started looking better, but felt like it had changed the color so much that I lost a lot of the "creamy" look I was after. So, I went into renegade painter mode and tried applying more cream paint-lightly, and mixed with water...and this was just what it needed!  Here is a picture of the before and after.  I am not saying I am ready to have a storefront, but I am definitely happy with how cute they turned out:)

Before...

After...

Up close

FINAL!:)

My next project is for Will's upcoming FIRST Birthday Party.  I am still in denial that he can possibly be this close to turning one...but denial or not, I still want him to have an adorable birthday party!  He is having an elephant themed birthday party using reds and aquas...and I wanted something cute to hang in the doorway of our den/kitchen.  I saw them on Pinterest, priced them on Etsy and decided I could do it!  Here is the almost finished product:)  It will also be used one day in his "big boy" room to hang over his bed...so dual purpose!  Yay!  Excuse the mess on our kitchen table...too many projects:)  Off to clean up now!!!

Will's rag garland!

Dear Will...

Dear Will,

I intended on writing you at nine months but that month seemed to fly by...just as the eight months before that!  Will, you are truly the most precious little guy and I feel so blessed to be your mommy.  You get a little more fun everyday.  I wrote to you last at six months...and my how you have changed!  You are all smiles these days and you think the simplest things are so funny-for example when Mommy talks on the phone.  You are learning to eat so many new things ("real food") and I have yet to find anything that you don't like. You have tried, and loved:  grapes, mandarin oranges, peaches, cheerios, puffs, cheese puffs, beef tips and rice, broccoli, cheese slices, grilled cheese, soft pretzels (our favorite treat when we go to the mall), eggs, peanut butter, graham crackers, goldfish, spaghetti, macaroni and cheese, and you LOVE propel out of the bottle-mommy's bottle that is:)  You are standing up but you haven't taken any steps yet...but you're getting close!  Your "army crawl" has turned into a full blown crawl and sometimes you "run crawl"-as Daddy and I call it!  Your favorite toy right now is the lid to a metal pot and your plastic balls that make noise when you shake them.  You can't sleep without "puppy" in your hand.  When I put you down at night, and hand you puppy you smile really big and pull puppy up to your face...it is so adorable!  You go to sleep around 7:30 or 8:00 and you USUALLY wake up around 6:30....sometimes earlier!  You are going to "moms day out" twice a week and your teacher is Mrs. Suni, who you love.  She sends Mommy pictures of you riding in the buggy with the other children and you are always sleeping in the buggy:)  You love looking at pictures and videos of yourself and you know the difference between a picture of you and a picture of another baby.  When you see pictures on the wall of yourself, you get so excited and point saying "da!" You know how to say "daddy" and you get so excited when I tell you "daddy's home!"  You call Cheney and Gus "ga" and "da" and you sure do love your doggies.  Cheney and Gus are getting fatter by the day with all the food you feed them from your high chair.  Your other favorite activity is pulling every book off the bookshelf in your room...this has become a 3-4 times a day activity for you! Wherever I take you, people comment on how beautiful your blue eyes are and how pretty your hair is.  I have to confess that a lot of people think you are a girl and when I correct them, they tell me "he's too pretty to be a girl".  You are truly the cutest little thing and I cannot imagine you being any more adorable!  You have the amazing ability to be absolutely perfect  whenever we are in public but you show your personality (loud crying) at home! 

Daddy and I have sooo many nicknames for you, so bless your heart if you never know your real name!  We call you Will bug and Will bean the most.  Daddy calls you "Wilsonville" sometimes (not sure where he got that one!).  I call you Angel Pie and Angel Love the most...but also Sugarbean, Precious, and Pumpkin:)  At the doctor's office, you are around 75% in height, 50% in weight and 98% in head circumference (your head has to be big to hold your huge brain!).  You don't mind going to the doctor and you only cry for a about a half a second after your shots...you're tough like your daddy!-not like your mommy who still hates shots.  You have a total of four teeth-2 up top and 2 on bottom. Your top teeth were a booger and made you hurt and run fever so bad.  I took you to the doctor because you ran fever of over 102-103 for 3 straight days and bless your heart, they checked you for everything known to man...only to determine that it was your teeth. I hope your next set is not near as evil as your top teeth were!  You are already a little flirt because you love little girls, middle-age girls and older women!  You smile immediately when you see a female...which means trouble for your sweet Mom one day:(  You have adorably fat feet and thighs!  I sing a made-up song to you at night and it includes the lyrics, "your big blue eyes and your super fat thighs".  You've had a couple of injuries in the last two weeks with your little mouth, when you've fallen down and bit your lip.  It always makes your little mouth bleed which makes me feel so bad.  I have comes to grips with this is all part of you growing up, so I am doing a little better since the first fall!  Your first trip to the beach is coming up and I cannot wait to see how you like the sand and water.  If you like the beach half as much as you like the bathtub, then you are going to have one awesome time! You have three tiny bathing suits that I cannot wait to see you in either!  The Easter bunny brought you 2 sand pails and a shovel to play with, so it should be fun times in the sand! I am absolutely loving each and every day with you and you truly do get more fun by the day.  I want you to know that I have never regretted for a minute not going back to work and it's important to me that you know how much I treasure every second I have with you.  You have brought more joy to our lives in your short time on this earth and I will never stop telling you how amazingly precious you are to us.  I probably tell you 50+ times a day how much I love you and probably give you 100+ kisses to show you!  I have to say that I cannot wait for the first reciprocated hug or kiss from you...it is going to melt your Mommy's heart!  

I love you Will Bug and am so very proud to call you mine!
Love, Mommy

You love to pucker  your little lips!

You with "puppy"

Becoming "seasoned"

Shewwww weeeee...what a week!  Last Saturday our little Will started running fever.  We went to the doctor on Monday and his doctor thought it was most likely fever virus and that it would run it's course.  On Wednesday, Will was doing so much worse...not eating and somewhat lethargic.  We went back to the doctor and he tested positive for the FLU!:(  On Thursday we thought he was getting better because the fever was way down, but on Friday (yesterday) it spiked again...so back to the doctor we went.  Our little man was diagnosed with an ear infection!. So here it is 2:24 a.m. on Saturday and I am blogging because my little boy just woke up wanting to eat!  PRAISE THE LORD!  I am so happy to see that he's getting a little bit of an appetite back.  On top of all of this with Will, we both caught the flu from him...so caring for him has been truly a challenge.  I had the flu shot, but Cullen did not, so as terrible as I felt, I was probably the most healthy of us all.  If this is what having a "lessened" form of the flu feels like, I am sooo thankful to my nurse friend Joan Wells for pushing me to have the flu shot, because I can't imagine it being much worse!  Joan can attest that I HATE shots, but came a long way in my 9 years working at hospice.  This year, as a non-hospice employee, I CHOSE to get the shot and I can honestly give an honest shout out to the flu shot now!  Cullen and I were suppose to leave for a romantic getaway on Thursday, but things changed when we all became stricken with nastiness.  As I sit here in the early morning silence (and feeling some better), I can honestly say that despite how trying this week has been...I have learned so much.  I have learned a lot about active prayer this week.  I did not have a typical "quiet time" this week...sitting down and writing in my prayer journal and going to Him in prayer.  What I DID have was time with my Savior praying over Will as I rocked my toasty warm little boy to sleep.  I prayed while rocking, I prayed while showering, I prayed while I tried to muster up enough energy to walk up the stairs (as my legs were aching like I had actually done something athletic).  It was one of those times in your life when you pray actively and persistently for the Lord to give you strength...and He did.  I found myself constantly quoting scriptures in my head to remind myself that He will give me strength and He will see me through.  Every time I felt I had no more energy and that my tank was empty...He provided!  The Lord not only provided me with energy when I needed it, but He also provided me with friends who knew just what I needed, when I needed it.  I had friends drop off meals, food, groceries...and most of all, I had friends praying for us.  This week has been a challenge, but I feel like I grew a lot as a mother.  I think about my former job, as a hospice social worker.  I did not become a "seasoned" social worker through caring for my easy patients with no needs.  I did not become a seasoned social worker by helping caregivers who were grieving appropriately and had no emotional struggles.  I became a seasoned social worker through the challenging cases on my caseload.  It was in those times that I leaned on the Lord to guide me as I tried to reach the needs of those I was caring for.  He used those times to mold me and teach me about empathy and how to minister to those who are hurting.  I don't think that my new "job" is any different.  I think the Lord uses weeks like this one to mold us as mothers, and to teach us how to truly care for our little ones...and to remind us that we can't do it without Him!  I am a work in progress and I am so very thankful that I know WHO is at work within me.  All that to be said, I am praying for a healthier week for the Smith family next week!!!  We didn't have the easiest of weeks, but it was one week.  There are so many out there who deal with the sickness of their little ones on a daily basis with no end in sight and my heart aches for them on a whole new level.  Thanks to everyone who was there for us this week...you know who you are:)